Gooooooooooooooood Morning early birds. Happy First day of daylight savings! The one thing that I consider consistent in my life can’t even figure out what time it is, so we’re up early for a Sunday morning special for Devil Wears Eyeblack.
Chances are if you live in New England, you know that the Pats are playing the Green Bay Packers on Sunday Night Football tonight & traditional sports media has beat to death the “steaming hot takes” of “Who’s really the GOAT? Brady or Rodgers?”.
I’d be doing you a disservice if I didn’t give you our own breakdown, but in our oh so delicate and sarcastics ways.
**Warm up round**
Advantage: Brady — I prefer my men without creeper staches.
Round 1-Personal life
In case you live under a rock, WAG stands for “Wife and Girlfriend”. Aaron Rodgers is dating race car driver, Danica Patrick. She’s cute and can drive the hell out of car, but Tom is married to the
highest paid Supermodel in the World the essence of beauty herself, Gisele Bundchen. Not even going to try and hide my girl crush here.
Literally every time I go to the salon I say I’d like a mixture of Gisele’s and Sofia Vegara’s hair. Aim high ladiez. Not to mention she’s an environmental activist, and mental health advocate. Gisele for prez.
For all of my Bachelor Nation readers out there, we all know how little bro Jordan used their last name to get him the final rose on Jojo’s season of the bachelorette, anddddddddddddddddd to air out their families dirty laundry.
Aaron and the rest of the Rodgers haven’t spoke in years, and people are tightlipped to say why.
On the contrast, Brady’s instagram is filled with pictures of his kids, parents and sisters.
So what if people may have gotten up in arms over Tom kissing his son on the lip?. I’ll take that over someone who writes their family off over some instagram ads.
Rodgers has had a pretty lengthy endorsement deal with StateFarm Insurance, and he’s so much less annoying than Jake from Statefarm.
Tommy on the other hand:
While we all love a pair of Uggs on a snowy morning where we don’t plan on making human contact unless it’s with a delivery driver, I’m going with Rodge on this one.
I know it’s Sunday and you’re prob a little hungover, but here’s a simple math question: Is 5 greater than 1?
Yes, the only answer is yes.
Honestly, did any of you really think I wasn’t going to heavily favor my Lord and Savior? This is my blog, and all journalism rules are tossed out the window.
Bonus: Clay Matthews footage from Pitch Perfect to put a smile on everyone’s face while they try to figure out what time it is
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